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If only I weighed less...

  • I'd go after that job
  • I'd be married
  • My parents would look at me with approval 
  • My kids would be proud of me
  • I'd wear a bathing suit
  • I'd wear a revealing bathing suit
  • My knees wouldn't hurt so much 
  • I wouldn't have diabetes 
  • My spouse would touch me again
  • I'd go on that vacation 
  • I could exercise
  • I would have more confidence
  • I would do some public speaking
  • I would have more control in my life
  • ...I'd finally be happy

Sound familiar? Chances are you've had one of these thoughts a time or two, maybe more. Well, I'm here to deliver some shocking news: your weight is not stopping you from being active, taking risks, challenging yourself, having deep and meaningful relationships, having confidence, making people proud of you, managing health conditions or being truly happy. What is stopping you is the lack self-compassion, self-care and using “weight” as a crutch to avoid facing the root cause for your unhappiness head on.

Instead of pursuing happiness by researching diets or methods to lose weight, make a list of areas in your life where you feel unfulfilled. Are you lacking meaningful relationships or friendships? Is your job no longer challenging you or is it too challenging? Are you chronically lacking sleep? Are your eating habits leaving you feeling sluggish and overfull, or perhaps under-fueled? Do you lack self-esteem or confidence? Are you feeling overwhelmed with caring for your child with special needs? Do you possess effective methods for coping with your emotions?

If you said "yes" to any of these questions then the problem is not your weight. And the solution is not weight loss. The solution lies in asking for help from an understanding doctor, a counselor or local registered dietitian, who is on board with helping you make changes in your life that leave you feeling more complete as a person and less likely to tear yourself down based on the size of your body.

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